Aliveatwork's Blog


It’s not my Fault … it was the At – titude ….

You’ve heard them …

On television, in the news, at your office, your church, even your kid’s volleyball game!

People complaining and blaming others for their short falls and failures.

It surprises me that they actually believe their failures have nothing to do with themselves. They believe the fault lies with some – thing or some – one else.

I believe the reason many people do not succeed at the level they desire is because they have blocked their path to success with self-imposed obstacles.

Self-imposed obstacles can show up in any number of different ways, however most of them originate from our internal thoughts and beliefs.

So is it possible your path to success might be littered with a few limiting beliefs?

Below is a short list of 10 self-limiting beliefs (obstacles) that could be stopping you.

  1. Believing that your past will determine your future.
  2. Believing that everyone else has what it takes to succeed .. everyone BUT you!
  3. Believing that there is not enough abundance in the world and you must take from others to have enough for yourself.
  4. Believing those old, worn out lies that were handed to you as a child. Beliefs like … “You will never amount to anything because you are not __________ enough or your too _________ (fill-in-the-blanks).”
  5. Believing that other people knows what is best for you.
  6. Believing that you shouldn’t ruffle any one else’s feathers so it’s best to play small to keep the peace.
  7. Believing that you must play the cards you were dealt for the rest of your life (hey, if they can change decks in Vegas … you can change the deck you were dealt … you just have to change what you believe).
  8. Looking at the resources you have and seeing them as obstacles.
  9. Believing that you are responsible for someone else’s obstacles or self-limiting beliefs (thanks to my friend Richard for sharing).
  10. Forgetting that you are extraordinary and powerful beyond measure … yes you are amazing!

When we don’t succeed it is easy to point our finger at something else and say … it was the altitude, it was someone else’s fault that I … lost, looked bad, didn’t deliver, or didn’t win.

It takes a courageous person to own that the reason they are not winning is due to their own self-imposed obstacles.

Zig Ziglar once said that “it is your attitude not your aptitude, that determines your altitude.”

Let me just say in the spirit of Zig …

“Your ability to fly is determined by your ability to remove the self limiting obstacles(beliefs) from your path. The fewer obstacles in your way … the higher you will go!

So what altitude are you cruising at these days?

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And the Truth Shall …

A few weeks ago I had an opportunity to work with a  group of Leaders. At one point in the day we arrived at a fork in the road.

Path A: Ignore the elephant in the room and continue to pretend that everything was “fine,” even though everyone knew it was not!

Path B: Own the truth about themselves and each other and speak it directly and without blame. Not from a place of anger but from a place of  ownership, responsibility, and intention.

They chose path B,  and I have to admit there were some very intense moments as we worked through the process. There was hesitation, fear, doubt, and all the things that normally prevent people from speaking their truth.

And when it was done …

There was relief, a lightness, a sense that a 100 lb weights had been lifted off of their chests … in a word … freedom.

No hiding, no pretending, just the truth.

So many time we are afraid to speak the truth, we fear the worst, because we fear loss of some kind. And yet time and time again when Leaders are courageous and speak the truth from a loving place and not a place of fear  … amazing things happen.

Teams become closer, walls come down, leaders get clarity about themselves and their colleagues.

Maybe that John guy was right, “you will know the truth and the truth will make you free.”

So what about you … need a little more freedom in your life?



L-O-V-E: What You Do …

A survey of nearly 11,000 employees by Blessings White showed that only 31% of those surveyed stated they were engaged at work.

That means 69% are not engaged and when you’re not engaged you probably don’t like what you do!

If employee engagement and job satisfaction are directly linked to profitability you would think that most leaders in an organization would have a plan in place to improve it and they would be held accountable for implementing it and yet …

A survey of leaders showed that 75% of them had no engagement plan or strategy, even though 90% said engagement impacts business success. (ACCOR)

The Truth …

If you don’t like your job … it is NOT the responsibility of your boss, your company, or anyone else to make you happy … it is up to you!

The way I see it … if you don’t love what you do you have 3 options:

  1. You could quit, walk away, throw in the towel, surrender, give in, and find a position that is better suited for you, your values, and your needs.
  2. You could stay put stay where you are and keep focusing on what you don’t like, what’s wrong, and what other folks should be doing so you can be happier at work.
  3. You could shift your perspective and what you believe about your work.

Want to be a little happier at work?

7 things that you could do to improve your happiness level @ work:.

  1. Focus on what works and what is good about your job.
  2. Make a list of all the things you are able to buy with your paycheck for you and your family.
  3. List all the reasons you’re a good fit for this job.
  4. When you are at work … work … and when you are at home, be home and focus on your family, friends, and the other things that make you happy.
  5. Answer this question: If I was giving a 110% effort at work what would I be doing … and then do it!
  6. Set a target productivity level, a sales goal, or a promotion, and then focus all of your energy on achieving that target.
  7. Set a realistic time frame to accomplish your target. And when you hit them, one of 3 things will happen: a) You will be rewarded for your achievements. b) You will be happier simply because you were more focused and more productive. c) You will be crystal clear that you need find a position and a company that works better for you.

Russian dramatist Maxim Gorky said, “When work is a pleasure, life is joy! When work is a duty, life is slavery.”

When it is all said and done, nobody is responsible for your happiness at work.

The decision to love what you do is up to you … so choose wisely and choose often.



Hope and Change and Change and Hope and … Get Over it!

Webster’s dictionary defines hope as a feeling.

It states … hope is “the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best.”

I believe that hope begins with a thought, a frame of mind, and that thought causes us to feel a certain way, and then we act on that feeling.

Nearly 4 years ago the world was filled with the idea of hope, actually hope and change. Four years later many people are filled with a sense of hopelessness because promises that were made were not kept. In many ways some folks are worse off than they were four years ago.

If you sat around and waited for someone else to step up and deliver you a basket full of hope, I can’t imagine you’re beaming with hope right now. And for the record it doesn’t matter who’s driving the bus!

This is not a statement about politics, it is a gentle reminder that no one … absolutely no one … is going to fulfill your dreams.

Not the government, your employer, the church, your spouse, your favorite sports team, or any other external factor … CREATING YOUR DREAMS AND ACHIEVING SUCCESS IS TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY UP TO YOU!

Sitting around and waiting for someone else to give you what you need will lead you down a path alright … a path that ends in hopelessness.

If you’ve lost your senses of hope lately here are 10 things you can do right now to take back control of your life and renew your sense of hope:

  1. Agree to take 100% responsibility for everything in your life … no excuses!
  2. Stop hanging around negative people who don’t line up with your values, your beliefs, or don’t believe in you … regardless of who they are.
  3. Stop watching the television and reading the newspaper. My friend Kama calls them hopesuckers and she’s right, they will literally drain you of any hope you that you have quicker than you can say lick-ity-split!
  4. Start reading books that will help you get what you want. Here are 3 I recommend: The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer, The 7 Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Choprah, and Power versus Force by David Hawkins.
  5. Decide that you already have everything you need in this moment to get the results that you want.
  6. Start meditating on a daily basis so that you can clear your mind of all of the distractions and old beliefs that are getting in the way of your dreams.
  7. Remember this is your one and only one life and that you are never too old to realize your dreams. Colonel Sanders was 66 years old when he started Kentucky Fried Chicken.
  8. Live as if everything you do will be the last time you will ever do it. Your last blog, kiss, sales call, etc.
  9. Remember that you are amazing and extraordinary and you have limitless possibilities.
  10. When and if you start to lose your sense of hope go back to the beginning of this list and start again …

Hope begins with your thoughts … so think big and never let anyone else tell you that they know better than you, what you need or what you are capable of …

That is my hope for you!



Somebody Hold Me Accountable .. PLEASE!!!!

Most of us want to be successful …

Most of us want what we want …

Most of us want more …

And the truth be told … we want it to be easy!

Have you ever wished you could simply wave a magic wand and create your dream life?

What would you wish for … exotic cars, amazing houses, fabulous vacations, traveling the world …  of course you would give a portion to charity … right?

Whatever your dream is, you know that success doesn’t happen just because you read  “The Secret” or that it will simply knock on your  front door while you’re inside watching American Idol on the couch!

Well maybe some folks do … and most of us know that if we want to be successful we need a few things.

We need: 

  1. Clarity –  of our vision or goal – what we really want.
  2. A Plan – that is well defined, attainable, and measurable.
  3. Consistent Execution – over a long period of time.
  4. Accountability – that keeps us on track or helps us get back on track when we slip a little or a lot! 

Of course all four components are needed in order to be successful. But if I had to admit which of the four I find the most difficult to achieve … I would say Accountability. Why?

First, I think it is difficult to commit to being held accountable. It requires a willingness to be vulnerable, a surrendering of sorts … and surrendering or asking for help typically isn’t in my vocabulary.

Second, I think it is rare to find the right person or group of people who challenge you, question you, praise you, guide you, help you get back up on your feet when you fall down, and love you enough to tell you the truth … the whole truth and nothing but the truth!

We can all sit down and write out our goals … we do it all the time. We can create a plan, and start executing our plan. We can even hold ourselves accountable … for awhile.

However, I have found that without checking in with another person or group on a daily or weekly basis I easily start to slip off the path …

And when I slip off the path my actions become erratic and inconsistent …

And when I am inconsistent with my actions I am not following my plan so well …

And when I don’t follow the plan … I don’t achieve my goals or the level of success that I want … basically I miss the target.

Accountability is the glue that holds it all together. It is what gets you back on track, It’s the pat on the butt when you succeed and a kick in the a** when you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and play bigger!

So what about you … who’s holding you accountable?

Need a little help?

If you need a kick in the a** email me, call me, or respond to this blog, and I will help you find a system that can help you achieve more success than you ever thought was possible!

And you were waiting for … ?